Meat Grinder Mike
Meat Grinder Mike is a prank call victim of the Birmingham Redneck. He was first called by daeHkiD in the summer of 2012. His name is inspired by his threats of using meat preparation tools against some of the people who keep calling him.
Mike is also familiar with the personality of Frank "Duncan" Garrett, having been called by him enough times to know that he is/was in Oklahoma.
Mike is depicted with the character of Harvey Logan from the 1969 movie Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, played by Ted Cassidy.
He is known to have a intense dislike for those who live in, or those hailing from the deep-south of the United States. He identifies them based upon their accents; This trait is exploited by his prank caller(s) who use the appropriate soundboards. (Although, when called by the Black Guy, he mistaken him for a hillbilly.)
Mike is proud of being a resident of Ohio which is what he considers a "civilized area" unlike places like Oklahoma which he considers to be inhabited by "Steers and Queers." (As revealed when Duncan called him in "Meat Grinder Mike's telephone nightmare.")
Mike also has a relatively strong command of the English language, coming up with some original variations of otherwise traditional insults. For instance, it can be argued that one of his signature insults is some variation of "Suck the sloppy end of my fuck-stick." which, in itself, is a variation of the traditional insult "Suck my dick." It can be speculated that these catch-phrases are what Mike uses to make his identity more distinct from the usual swearing person.
When called by the Irate Black Man, he proceeded to mock his accent and mannerisms. Although not proven, it's possible he may have a dislike for black people as well; Further circumstantial evidence of this dislike is his comment about hanging and or whipping the caller "like they used to do in the slave days." However, it is worth mentioning that this was an aggravated response to the racial slurs from the Wife Beater; it can be speculated that Mike was being humorously ironic instead of prejudiced in this response.
Mike may have a pet bird judging by the fact that screeching can often be heard in the background of the calls, usually the bird screeching in response to Mike's yelling at the phone.
- "Mike... MIKE!"
- "I'm gonna kill you if I find you.. if I find I'm gonna kill you.."
- "Quit calling me and bothering me."
- "Well I'm going to tell you this right now: If I catch you, I'm going to fucking use a meat tenderizer on your face, so, so, when you do-your funeral people won't recognize you."
- "Hey-hey-hey-hey, butthead!"
- "You're a sick person!"
- "You miserable motherfucker."
- "What number are you trying to call?!"
- "Who the fuck is this?"
- "Why are you bothering me you moron?"
- "You need to learn how to use a phone."
- "Who's this?"
- "So who am I talking to?"
- "Yes, I am.."
- "I'll call you, asshole!"
- "Suck my dick you asshole."
- "You called me you fucking lowlife hillbilly."
- "You need to learn how to dial a phone you idiot."
- "I'm trying to help you, you dumb motherfucking lowlife hillbilly!"
- "Why don't you suck the slop(py) end of my fuck-stick."
- "Why don't you go fuck yourself and suck the slop(py) end of my fuck-stick."
- "Hey li-listen here you dumb motherfucker low-life hillbilly: I ain't calling you all right. If-if I find you somewhere, I'm going to use a meat grinder on you all right?"
- "You know what, If-if I find you, your family will have to have a closed casket, because I'm going to take and I'm going to mutilate your ass."
- "You know something, why don't you go back to third grade and learn how to use the phone."
- "All you are is just human excrement, that's all, the best part of you ran down your father's leg, you piece of garbage."
- "I have more respect for animals in cages than I do for people like you, you piece of garbage."
- "Listen here you motherfucking hillbilly, I'll fucking come over with a fucking meat tenderizer and I'll fucking tenderize your fucking skull!"
- "You motherfucking human excrement!"
- "This is Mike, who is this asshole?!"
- "I'm going to tell you something right now you piece of shit, I know somebody who works for the IRS, and at anytime I want I can have them call and put a tracer on this line and find out exactly where each one of my calls are coming from, and guess what, when I find out who you are, I'm going to come over and you'll die a slow fucking death."
- "I don't care if you're the president of the United States you dumb motherfucker."
- "All you people from Oklahoma need help"
- "Are you following me, you knucklehead?!"
- "Listen here you fucking hillbilly dumb motherfucker! If I was down there I'd bash your fucking skull in! Don't you call me anymore alright?"
- "You called me up, you redneck."
- "Are you calling from a cell phone?"
- "You are calling me on my landline."
- "I'm gonna make your last days on this earth miserable; just miserable. I'm gonna drag you through the fucking woods, pri-prickly bushes, and everything."
- "You are ONE human excrement."
- "Well I'm tired of it."
- "You need to quit acting like a fucking two year-old!"
- "I'm tired of all you rednecks calling."
- "Man if I see you I'm going to whip you like they used to do in the slave days, I'm going to whip you like a dog."
|2012||Birmingham Redneck Calls Meat Grinder Mike||daeHkiD||Meat Grinder Mike||Original call.|||
|2012||Arnold Calls Meat Grinder Mike||FridockShir||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|May 7, 2012||Prank calling Meat Grinder Mike||Whoruandwherdyoulive||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|August 20, 2012||Yankee Tough Guy vs. Meat Grinder Mike||Rawpranks||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|August 20, 2012||Meat Grinder Mike's telephone nightmare||Whoruandwherdyoulive||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|Angry Grampa Calls Meat Grinder Mike (+Bonus Call )||daeHkiD||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|Jesus Lady Calls Meat Grinder Mike||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|Meat Grinder Mike Eats Vicodin Then Calls Himself||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|(Meat Grinder Mike) - New Calls||Puremadnessman||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|NYC C*** Calls Meat Grinder Mike||FridockShir||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|Respected Gentleman Calls Meat Grinder Mike||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|Return of Meat Grinder Mike||daeHkiD||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|setting up a date (call to meat grinder mike)||Dialtone Disasters||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|unprepared call to meat grinder mike||Dialtone Disasters||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|missing bird (mike)||Dialtone Disasters||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|lost cat (mike)||Mobiethian||Meat Grinder Mike|||
|TFP calls his mother and MGM calls his sister-in-law||Jack Inoff, daeHkiD||Tom From Phoenix's mother, Meat Grinder Mike's sister in law|||
|November 3, 2012||Frank Garrett - Duncan- Still raising hell||Whoruandwherdyoulive||Male victim|||
|November 4, 2012||Springfield Pervert, Mystery Man, Meat Grinder Mike, IBM calls a Girl||Puremadnessmann||Female victim|||
|November 14, 2012||Meat-Grinder Mike & The Prosecutor Harrass a Telemarketer||Sir Cranksalot||Female victim|||
|November 22, 2012||Satanic Racist & Meat Grinder Mike||Puremadnessmann||Male victim|||
|November 23, 2012||Mike calls a guy selling a meat grinder||AR15pranks||Male victim|||
|November 23, 2012||Springfield Pervert + Meat Grinder Mike + Prosecutor + Drunk Bailbondsman Call Party Bus Guy||Sir Cranksalot||Male victim|||
|November 23, 2012||(Meat Grinder Mike) calls Several Mikes + UK Girl||Puremadnessmann||Various|||
|November 28, 2012||Meat Grinder Mike BK Pimp Tom Racist Redneck Make The Rounds||Firstcomingg||Various|||
|November 29, 2012||Arnold Schwarzenegger and Mike the Meat Grinder call CCL||CCLMiami||Caribbean Cruise Lines|||
|December 7, 2012||Young Redneck, Random Asshole & Meat Grinder Mike Call an Italian Wigger||Sir Cranksalot||Male victim|||
|December 20, 2012||Al the Drunk and Mike make some calls||AR15pranks||Golden Garden Chinese Buffet|||
|December 29, 2012||Meat Grinder Mike Needs An Insurance Quote||Unoriginalprankstah|||
|January 1, 2013||Arnold, Mike and the Deputy need somewhere to crash||MrPrankGarrett|
|April 2013||Bailbondsh and Friends call the Debt Collectors (Part 7)||Wilford Brimley||Visions Financial|||
|August 3, 2013||Mama's Boy||Wilford Brimley||Mama's Boy|||
- Birmingham Redneck Calls Meat Grinder Mike on YouTube
- Meat Grinder Mike's telephone nightmare on YouTube
- Arnold Calls Meat Grinder Mike on YouTube
- Prank calling Meat Grinder Mike on YouTube
- Yankee Tough Guy vs. Meat Grinder Mike on YouTube
- Frank Garrett - Duncan- Still raising hell on YouTube
- Springfield Pervert, Mystery Man, Meat Grinder Mike, IBM calls a Girl on YouTube
- Meat-Grinder Mike & The Prosecutor Harrass a Telemarketer on YouTube
- Satanic Racist & Meat Grinder Mike on YouTube
- Mike calls a guy selling a meat grinder on YouTube
- Springfield Pervert + Meat Grinder Mike + Prosecutor + Drunk Bailbondsman Call Party Bus Guy on YouTube
- (Meat Grinder Mike) calls Several Mikes + UK Girl on YouTube
- Meat Grinder Mike BK Pimp Tom Racist Redneck Make The Rounds on YouTube
- Arnold Schwarzenegger and Mike the Meat Grinder call CCL on YouTube
- Young Redneck, Random Asshole & Meat Grinder Mike Call an Italian Wigger on YouTube
- Al the Drunk and Mike make some calls on YouTube
- Meat Grinder Mike Needs An Insurance Quote on YouTube
- Arnold,Mike and the Deputy need somewhere to crash on YouTube
- Bailbondsh and Friends call the Debt Collectors (Part 7) on YouTube
- Mama's Boy on YouTube
- Meat Grinder Mike Soundboard at DeviantArt.com